Sunday, 15 April 2012

Dirty Little Habits

Why do we do things when we no longer enjoy them?

Soured relationships.
Cigarettes that taste like shit.
Finishing books when we hate the way the author writes.

It makes no sense.
In order to grow we must shake the shit that weighs us down; get rid of that guy that brings you nothing but anxiety, throw away the book when the writer is full of doom, gloom and pessimism and quit those damn cigarettes.


so easy to become accustomed to.

nothing holds us back like ourselves, as they say; we are our own worst enemy.

cut the ties, ditch the shit and throw it all away. live happily with no baggage.
we are born free, born to be, to change, to experience, to grow, to learn and to evolve into whatever you want to.

don't wait for a sign- just get moving.

time is timeless. don't grow old expecting to grow old. 

March 2012


LOVE or lack of love, or the idea of love, or the promise of love.
The all consuming engagement of one heart to another, or one heart to nothing.
They say "love hurts"  but I don't know if that explains it truthfully. Because the whole process can hurt. Sometimes it can hurt before it has even turned into love. Sometimes it hurts before we make love, before we fall in love, before we acknowledge we have love. 
Love doesn't hurt; people hurt. 
People hurt each other all the time, with guns, with words and with careless actions. But the worst kind of hurt, one of which you may think you will never truly recover, is the hurt of someone that you have unspoken love with.
It doesn't have to be dramatic, it's just that you simply know that even though the feeling is unspoken- it exists. Because you revealed a secret side of yourselves to one another, because you are blindly willing to accept that person for all that they are; even at their worst, because you shared stories, shared thoughts, shared dreams and confessed fears and then- your hurt, before you can even blame it on love.
I can't decide whether it would be easier to be hurt by someone that you are 'in love' with, or by the person you held in such high esteem that you could have loved them if it was simpler? 

I try to be careful with hearts that find their way into my hands. I want to protect them and keep them safe, because it is rare for someone to hand over the one thing that you can break. 

Trust is a fragile thing, one wrong move and you break all the ties that keep two people close. One wrong move and you can kiss goodbye to all of tomorrow's promises and all of yesterdays memories. One wrong move and you are forcibly forgotten because remembering leaves a bad taste in your mouth. 

Don't blame love for all shitty things that people do to ruin it. Leave love alone so that at least there is something good to look forward to.